Guys I Love

So I’ve been trying desperately to win tickets to The Women’s Conference in California by entering all their monthly on-line give aways. The most recent contest for free tickets is to write in 200 words or less about “Guys We Love”. As the mother of two boys, the sister of two brothers, the best pal to dudes a plenty, a hot number and the wife of the ever charming Bobby Crismond, 200 words was not nearly enough to for me to expound on all the guys I love. I could probably go on for days and days on this subject but I know we’re all short on time so I’ll try to keep it short. Here is a sampling of the many guys I love and why I love them so damn much.

Bobby Crismond – well, if you’ve seen him then you know it’s partly because I’m shallow and he’s hot. Like super hot. But I love Bobby for more than that. I love him because at the very worst moment of my life, he fully accepted all my crazy baggage and swept in to save me. Our friend Rossi loves to call Bobby “a hater” because as I’ve talked about before, he sort of hates a lot of things (men in tight tee-shirts, Bluetooth guy, Cameron Diaz, etc) and he definitely doesn’t like everyone. The thing is that when he does like someone or something, he is intensely loyal. He is your best friend. That doesn’t mean he won’t continue to make fun of your jogging attire or your incredibly nerdy knowledge of Star Wars trivia. He will be the first one to bust on your receding hairline or your clothes or the weight you put on recently. And he will make up mean nicknames for you like “Fat Pappy” or “Bitchard” but somehow he’s super high level of charm and affability will allow him to get away with all this. And when the chips are down he is the person who is going to be there for you and you won’t care that his ribbing you nonstop because it’s that loving teasing that is going to get you through the storm.

Kevin McCarthy – My dad is not conventional. And while there are times that I think it might be nice to have the kind of dads you see on sitcoms, I would never ever trade the dad I have. When I was in 6th grade with 6 girls and 15 boys and my dad chaperoned our camping trip, all the boys wanted to be in my dad’s cabin because he was cool. He didn’t make them hunt for fossils like the chaperones were supposed to do. He played football with them. For someone with the kind of work ethic my dad has – we’re talking about a man who worked his way through college and law school on construction jobs and ended up being more successful than he had ever dreamed – he always valued fun. No one likes sitting around drinking beer and telling the old stories more than my dad. I’ve heard them all a hundred times and I hope I get the chance to listen to them 100 more. My dad is tough but it’s all an act because underneath his never cry exterior is a guy who has buried more people he loves than anyone should have to and has done it all with grace and dignity. A guy who keeps stuffed animals in his office in a case a child stops by. A guy who hates talking about anything but it doesn’t matter because his true feelings are right there under the surface poking out at you. A guy my kids call Noodle and he allows it, even answers to it. My dad is not like your dad, he’s not like any dad, and I’m glad.

Sylvester Stallone – No I’ve never met him but his characters, Rocky Balboa, John Rambo and Robert Hatch. One of them ended the Cold War, one of them saved POWs and one of them ensured the freedom of a team full of concentration camp victims. And yes, they were all a bit ridiculous but as a young person I found the characters Stallone portrayed inspiring and I tried to emulate them in my real life. I’m extremely resilient. Most of that resilience I got from Kevin McCarthy but a little of it I owe to Sylvester Stallone.

Denis Leary & Steve Buscemi – because rumor has it that on September 11, 2001 they suited up with their former colleagues and headed to the Twin Towers to actually fight the fires. Here are guys who hadn’t been firemen in years. Guys who could have just written checks to help. But when they saw what kind of help was really needed they went in there and took action.

Ken Jeong – Like the rest of you, I loved him in The Hangover and I love him on Community, but my love for him skyrocketed when I saw him take home a trophy at the MTV Movie Awards this year and break down crying about his love for his wife and salute her for being cancer free after a terrible battle. Amazing.

Ted Kennedy – My mom LOVED the Kennedys. She worked for the Justice Department and was photographed crying the day Bobby was assassinated. I still have the picture of her from The Washington Post. My dad was much more realistic about the Kennedys. He could see the good and the bad. To him they were people, not Gods. I never really had strong feelings about them one way or another. And then Ted Kennedy died and I watched his funeral on TV and how I wished I had paid more positive attention to him when he was alive. Hearing politicians on both sides talk so glowingly about him was amazing. Hearing his nieces and nephews talk about how much he had done to help raise them and keep the family together was awesome. But hearing his own son talk about his dad sleigh riding with him, despite his disability, and helping him walk up the hill after they went down just about killed me. Here was a man that was known for a lot of unfortunate incidents: adultery, drinking, the death of a young woman in a car accident – and those things could easily have overshadowed him the rest of his life but they didn’t. Because Ted Kennedy wanted to help. He wanted to help his friends. He wanted to help his family. And he wanted to help his country. And gossip was not going to stop him. He worked to help others till the day he died and while I didn’t always agree with his politics, I think he was truly an outstanding person.

My friend James – because even though he thinks the things he does for others are no big deal, he’s wrong. James is not ordinary. And I know the seven women and one boy currently living with him are pretty happy about that.

Mike and Joe – last summer when I wanted to have college baseball players come live with us there were people who thought I was insane to take in strangers and be responsible for more boys. All of those people were wrong. You know in The Blind Side when Sandra Bullock is told that she’s changing that boy’s life and she says “No. He’s changing mine”. That about sums up how my family feels about Mike and Joe.

Mills – we became friends because we both thought Keanu Reeves performance in Youngblood was priceless. Mills immediately sold me out at an office party because that’s how he rolls. Usually that kind of thing would kill a friendship for me but I knew from day one that Mills and I had too much in common to not be friends. And I knew he needed someone to try and run his life for him and I am totally that person. Mills rarely takes my advice but I never stop giving it to him. We’re good like that.

Pat Noel – I met Pat Noel in fourth grade and he’s still one of the closest friends in my life. That’s pretty awesome but what’s even more awesome is that Pat is still close friends with pretty much everyone he’s ever met. The guy has like 72 best friends. Everyone loves Pat is not an exaggeration. Everyone does love him. And he keeps in touch with all of us. Pat has had a life with as many ups and downs as the rest of us but you’d never know it because he is always positive, always optimistic. He got married in 2008 and his wife is a pretty terrific woman. She’s also one of the luckiest people alive because while everyone loves Pat, he loves Adrienne. And that’s pretty cool.

This is just the tip of the iceberg for me. And I haven’t even touched on the fabulous little guys I live with, Mac and Charlie, or my most favorite fictional guy ever, Ray Kinsella. Women spend a lot of time ragging on guys who aren't so bad and obsessing over the guys who suck. What a waste of time. As someone who lived the first half of her life in a house with 3 guys and spends the best part of it now in a house with 3 guys, I think I have the credentials to say there is nothing better than a really great guy.